The Slow Girl's Guide To Marathon Training

Forward Movement

2012-03-05T03:02:00.001-08:00

So the marathon training bi-polar is currently on an upturn and there were days last week that you might catch me sneaking in a cheeky punch in the air and a quiet ‘whoop’; I’m English therefore these actions would not be overt or loud and would always be followed by an apology.

This next month is the heaviest of the training period as I start to kick the mileage up and tackle 18 and 20 milers whilst slotting in a trip to Berlin to run a half marathon (of course). I’m discovering that battling with my mindset is the biggest challenge facing me during this journey. Self-belief is hard to come by when you start an activity at the latter end of youth and cockiness and impulsiveness is starting to give way to cautiousness and a desire to closely analyse every. Possible. Outcome!

It is especially hard to come by when for twenty years of your life you have told yourself that you’re no good at sport.

Someone referred to me as sporty the other day.

I found it hard, but I managed not to laugh in their face.

Progress.

This weekend I ran a half marathon in Richmond Park and it put my mental stability to the test. You see I rely heavily on others to get me through and I like to think that I can be mutual to that relationship. But this weekend I was in the middle of a pack of people; some of which sped off and some that fell behind because of injury. This left me alone, without music, running in probably the worst weather I’ve ever had the pleasure to run in.

Mother nature was in a tricky mood and after waiting to see the moment where I handed over my waterproof, windproof jacket to my dedicated friend and supporter she promptly blasted down rain and wind upon my head and within 10 minutes I was a drowned rat with around 8 miles to run.

‘Interesting decision’ I thought as my mascara ran into my eyes adding blindness to my problems, ‘I’d better just get on with it then’.

I mentally broke up the course and tackled it bit by bit, forethought my strategy for dealing with the hill in the middle (just fucking walk up it) and pictured seeing my family at the end. The amazing Run Dem Crew supporters made an otherwise sparse course light up. The sound of people cheering your name and sticking out their hands as you pass makes you feel like a superstar.

Budget medal!

So I completed my second half marathon race and shaved more than ten minutes off the time of my first.

Progress.

More than that though I challenged my self belief and added another point to the side of confidence and flicked the V's to the mental demons.

WHOOP...

...Sorry.

Black Swan

2012-02-23T13:32:00.002-08:00

So, you remember that bit in Black Swan where Natalie Portman starts to realise she's cracking under the pressure of the mental & physical exhaustion involved in striving for perfection because she's pulling an actual black feather out of the pores of her own back? Erm...yeah...that.

Two months to go; I'm now officially chartering unknown territory running mileage that I have never attempted before. Forget about speed this is about endurance & the leap from half to full marathon training has kicked in.

After spending three days away on an activity residential with a bunch of 16 year olds, covering a total of 18 miles running in one weekend & spending an hour staring at my training plan the run up to Tuesday's Run Dem Crew was, on reflection, not ideal. Trying to stay positive I bounced into the 1948 building but could hear my anxiety creeping into the geeky mix of conversation that covered quality vs quantity running, training plans, & musings on my new pair of Nikes.

The run set off, I pushed it along with the others. We hit the secret graffiti tunnel, paused to savour the paint fumes before heading back off along the Southbank. Then it happened: Rapid Onset Marathon BiPolar (ROMB). Legs were moving but the dark cloud had descended. My head was being a bitch, draining all the energy from my feet up.

So I stopped.
And then I cried.

(Apparently crying in public gets much more embarrassing as you get older)

Much support then ensued whilst I composed myself but it was game over & I walked back.

How can I feel so effing unfit? I'm effing running all the mother effing time?

My wise cyclist brother-in-law tells me this often happens after a period of progress. Charlie Dark tells me I need to remember the bad training times to achieve the good. Running extraordinaire Simon Freeman tells me to keep my eye on the prize.

So this is work in progress. There's no neat Littlest Hobo style happy round up here. The fear that ROMB will reappear is a concern. Fingers crossed I won't cry in public any time soon. Hoping that one day I'll again be able to straighten my legs!

I'd like to say some thank yous to the crew that helped on Tuesday; Tony, Richard, Tiffany, Emma, Helen & Kimberly for the words & walk back. Kimberley again for my 'pick me up' pancakes along with Jackie & Vanessa. Charlie Dark for the super sized pep talk, all those that Tweeted...

...Wait...What do you mean we've run out of time?...You're cutting me off? F@*!

*flicks middle finger then storms off stage leaving a trail of black feathers behind her*

Sorry

2012-02-06T10:11:00.000-08:00

C: Did you have fun at the weekend?

Me: I did run, yes. Did a long one on Sa...

C: *stares*

Me: You didn't say run did you?

C: *blinks* *stares*

Food has become 'fuel'. Clouds form into the shape of medals. I see trainers in the ripples of the Thames (although that's not always hallucinatory). I have trouble hearing words ending in 'un'.

I am RUN BORE!

This is an unexpected powerful side effect from marathon training that I had grossly underestimated. I'm in a bubble necessary to keep me focused but as someone that usually has a diary full of weekends away it's a huge departure from normality. In a way it's a perfect antidote to the grim late winter months when everyone is fat & skint! This is normally the time of year that I feel groggy & miserable but I'm focused & active.

I do however feel slightly departed from reality. I'm sure my non-running friends & family are wondering what's going on. I am wondering myself. The shift is all encompassing; social, culinary, cognitive. I try to stop the running talk before I see people's eyes glazing over but sometimes it's difficult when I've...you know...just discovered a tasty carb gel.

So this is an open plea to my family & friends. If you see me doodling a map of London, slathering my face in Vaseline or humming 'Proud' by Heather Small, just gently pick me up & lead me to the nearest public house for some medicinal red wine and a deep conversation about TOWIE vs Made in Chelsea.

Aythanku. See you on the other side!

The M Word

2012-01-25T14:42:00.000-08:00

Motivation you are a fickle mistress indeed. How you tease by turning up, making me feel special then leave without word of when you may return.

Motivation you elusive bitch!

One minute I am riding high from Run Dem Crew Tuesdays, feelings of getting stronger & smelling that my goal is achievable. The next I am dragging my lead weighted legs around the streets of London spitting & muttering profanities under my breath.

The ups and downs can be far reaching and it is necessary to remind myself of why oh why I am doing this so I can drag my arse out of bed at 6am...

Because its hard & I need to challenge myself.

Because my self esteem has been boosted by feeling fitter, healthier and not having to worry about whether I look fat.

*Cue swelling music and a vision of me and Gordon Ramsey crossing the finishing line hands aloft and tears in our eyes*

There...simple...

Except it’s not. The slightest thing can knock the equilibrium, so I have put things in place to help me out; running with others, a playlist newly filled with podcasts, or a new route. There’s nothing like support to keep you going, getting a sponsor or hearing some benevolent words.

My lovely friend Matthew Shaw gave me a genuine boost when he wrote this in aid of my fundraising efforts:

“Times are hard but... if you purchase a daily Costa / Starbucks (other overpriced, mega-profit coffee chains are available) or a Sunday broadsheet or several pints a week then please consider giving one a miss just once and sending the £2 quid in the direction of my lovely, brave friend who is hitting the roads on London in this spring's marathon. Ellie is super-motivated and all support will help her to whizz past that finish line (Go Ellie) and support a well worth while cause. I know I sound Annie Lennox or Lennie Henry or worst of all bloody Bono but a few quid you won't even miss would really go a long way (26miles plus in fact!) That is all, thank you.”

I think if you have a friend who will risk sounding like Bono, you’ve got nothing to worry about, right?

So here’s my conclusion; I need to stay one step ahead and make sure my training plan does not just concentrate on the miles I’m clocking up. It’s all about headspace and making sure I get some so my legs are free to move without restriction.

See you at the finish line Ramsey!

Get yourself a crew

2012-01-15T08:44:00.000-08:00

"What's wrong with you people?" my colleague said with a slight snarl to his upper lip, "People die doing that!"

This is probably the most extreme reaction I've had on delivering the news that I'm training for a marathon. Another colleague told me he thought me courageous as I'm asthmatic. Hmmmm...People think I'm for it. I better practice my Mo Farah stare to install some faith in my ability.

Whatever...I've been underestimated before...

Whilst friends & family will of course want you to do well, for me the biggest support network of a novice marathon runner is my fellow runners. Last year when training for my first half marathon I had a realisation that after months of running alone I would have to stand in a crowd of thousands of people & get my stride on. 'Shit! I better practice running with others' I thought & so in August last year I went to my first Run Dem Crew night.

My kind of place; not a throw back to my anxious school days being terrified of being the slowest. Run Dem Crew promotes itself as a community that looks after each other whatever your ability. The nervous 14 year old girl unsure of her physical ability faded further last August & with the help of Run Dem Crew I'm facing in built demons that tell me that sports are not for me.

Do not underestimate the effect of a shared experience. The coming together of people for mutual support is not the reserve of alcoholics or weight watchers. Committing to run distance with people by your side opens you up to their story & them to yours. When running for hours on end you work stuff out with them, learn new things & improve. They keep you going & distract from your aching muscles. If I hadn't worked up the courage to walk in to Run Dem Crew alone last August then without doubt I wouldn't be embarking on such a huge personal challenge...or own as much Lycra!

And so continues my love affair with running...

There will always be someone faster than you...

2012-01-08T02:52:00.000-08:00

No matter how I try there will always be those that have years of training on me, who have 50% less body fat than me and whose stride will take me five to keep up with them. I can't compete, therefore I won't. The first thing I have had to do in my training for distance running is to make this about me and not get hung up on other people's talk about times. The dreaded 'C' word (com-com-competitive) has had long standing negative connotations for me since standing on a school sports field with my supposed best mates shouting at me aggressively. 'Why are you getting so worked up?' I thought, 'It's only a ball'...yeah I didn't get it.

So, the first rule of Slow Girl Training is to deal with the speed demons by admiring their toned Lycra clad bottoms as they run past you and then...get on with it! This is about your own Lycra clad bottom and about offering your support to those running behind you, because remember there will always be someone there too.